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Ode to the Triangle Fly
Triangle fly, I despise thee.
Your presence is felt
in late June and July,
Your evil bite shall be dealt.
Some call you deer fly,
Horse fly by others.
Your kind could be called
Truly evil mother futhers.
You literally follow me
As I work the homestead.
Alighting occasionally
Upon my hot head.
I try and I try
Unsuccessfully to swat you.
Your persistence is commendable,
'Tis your only virtue.
When at last you do bite
And I feel your impaction,
With my hand I do smash you
With great satisfaction.
Alas it is too late
The damage is felt
As my skin raises up
In a great itchy welt.
They say everything
Is on Earth for a reason.
Yet I see no benefit
Of you in this season.
And so triangle fly,
What I am asking of you,
Is to leave me alone.
I bid you adieu.
God, how I hate them. -Jenn
That's brilliant! Your own composition?
ReplyDeleteYes, I’m the poet.
DeleteOh no, HORSE FLIES! Those bastards actually take a chunk of meat out of you when they bite! Your poem is great but it is TOO NICE to them! You did not ONCE say BURN IN HELL FOREVER. But "mother futhers" was a nice poetic touch, I must admit.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Debra. I hate blackflies and mosquitoes but there is a special place in hell for these guys.
DeleteDown here in Australia we call them, March flies, horse flies or bot flies, they are big bastards but you don't feel them land until it's too late and you've been bitten 😡
ReplyDeleteYes, I’ve heard of bot flies. I didn’t know they were the same thing!
DeleteUGH! I remember being hounded by these beasts one time. They are nasty "mother futhers". Loved your poem!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Martha.
ReplyDeleteI remember horse flies from our time at the beach in the summer. We'd run like crazy into the water and they'd chase use there. You had to hold your breath until they found another victim. Not an option for you. You may have to carry a can of Raid with you...I wonder if that would discourage them?
ReplyDeleteGreat poem!
Yea, they literally stalk you!!
DeleteThey certainly made their persistent presence felt today, in the heat and humidity! I feel so sorry for all the woodland creatures that have to put up with them.
ReplyDeleteNice poem. Oh how I dislike the horse fly and their sting is as bad as the hornet.
ReplyDeleteUgh, those dastardly things do damage! What purpose do they serve? I see dragon flies demolishing mozzies and black flies but not these monsters.
ReplyDeleteHorse flies hurt when they bite. The last one that bit me took a hunk of flesh with it.
ReplyDeleteGod bless.
They are evil little bastids, that's for sure.
ReplyDeleteMy days are spent keeping an eye out for horseflies too. Once they find you they won't give up until you kill them - hopefully before they give you a painful bite which itches like hell for a week.
ReplyDeleteI used to get bitten on the leg by horse flies every year while sitting in the garden and my foot would swell and the wound would weep and itch. Then I discovered if I put savlon antiseptic lotion on straight away it stopped the infection. I now use this on any bite just in case and haven't suffered since. Great poem by the way.
ReplyDeleteLOL at your poem or is that a haiku? I hear you about the flies, nasty buggers. ... Mary-Lou =^[..]^=
ReplyDeletePoem. A haiku is a three line poem with specific number of syllables per line (5, 7, 5). There endeth the lesson 🙂.
DeleteWe have four seasons in Maine: Mud season, bug season, fall and winter.
ReplyDeletethe Ol'Buzzard
That fly looks almost like a bee... but apparently bites instead of stings... yuck!
ReplyDeleteI hate them too. My sister, who owns a cottage, found a solution. She paints the outside of a child's sand pail with Tanglefoot glue. (You can buy this glue at Amazon or at garden supply stores.) She puts the sticky bucket on the end of a stick or pole. The (light-coloured) sand pail will bounce around on the pole as the person walks and attract deer flies. She walks around her property carrying the bucket on a pole a few times a day. I do it too when I visit during deer fly season because it's delightfully satisfying to entrap them. This method will clear the area of deerflies for much of the day. In fact, after a week of this, it's hard to find a deer fly on her property. If people go swimming, my sister will stand faithfully by with her bucket so her guests can emerge safely from the water without getting bitten. It's a brilliant solution.
ReplyDeleteHmmm. That’s interesting. I might look into this! Thanks!
DeleteMy sister insists the pale blue buckets work the best. Apparently, they are drawn to this colour.
DeleteI wonder if this is what I saw in the bedroom at the lake yesterday. I was thinking it was some form of bee but they sure look similar. I wasn't in a position to kill it -- but I'm going to try next time!
ReplyDeleteIf it stalks you like the shark in the final scenes of Jaws, then it is! Haha!
DeleteHere in Michigan those are deer flies, horse or black flies are much larger and black. They both bite like a b_tch, the horse/black fly leaves a huge welt that lasts for weeks! We live out in the country and the flying fu_kers circle your head like a vortex. Hate them.
ReplyDeleteThis is very beautiful. My favorite line from the poem is:
ReplyDelete"Is on Earth for a reason.
Yet I see no benefit
Of you in this season."
Anyway, I'm so happy I found your blog because its awesome! :D
-Quinley