Thursday 26 January 2017

Incredibly Sad

Yesterday I learned that the daughter of friends of ours died in her sleep. I remember when she was born. We saw her in the hospital in her little blanket all bundled up. Her parents are wonderful people with whom we had many fun times and who also helped us out when we needed extra hands. She was twenty years old, if memory is correct. She just died in her sleep. She had her whole adult life ahead of her. She was healthy and smart and vibrant. I don't know how you carry on after something like that.

My heart is breaking for her, for her parents, for her brother, and her friends.

I came home from work and hugged my son. I contacted my daughter. My daughter, who is close in age and away from home as well, who I don't say goodnight to every night now, who I don't see when she wakes up in the morning, but who I just assume will be fine each day.

We must go to the funeral, but I am also dreading the funeral. The pain will be palpable.

I want to put my own two children (can I even call them children anymore?) in a bubble and make sure no harm ever comes to them. I know that isn't possible.

It's just so tragic.                   I don't even know if I should post this. I feel selfish in my own grief.

23 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry to hear this. This is really tragic. I can't imagine how much grief the parents are going through.

    And don't feel bad about posting about this. Sharing our feelings helps us sort and deal with them.

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  2. It is a tragedy. Grieve with the parents.

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  3. How very sad, and frightening. You're certainly not being selfish by sharing with us the source of your grief. It's also a reminder to us to cherish each day we have with the people we love. Many of us forget that in the day to day hustle and bustle of life, especially when our family members are young and healthy, and we take life for granted. God bless, and prayers for the family.

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  4. That is so very tragic. Words seem inadequate at a time like this but don't feel selfish by being sad.

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  5. That is truly & incredibly sad. The why will be ringing in her family's ears for days, weeks. Sending you & this young lady's family some healing loving thoughts. It is a good reminder that life is full of unknowns, the explainable & far too few days for many. Hug all that you love & often.

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  6. This life can chew us up and spit is out then do it all over again. How do we bear it? My own children are out of the house and, like you I just hope they are safe.

    I'm holding space for you and your family. And for her family. For a pain to last a lifetime.

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  7. As a Widow, I learned that GRIEF is most selfish. Let yourself grieve and don't feel that it is wrong.

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  8. I am so sorry for your friend. Glad you posted, for me sometimes just speaking the circumstances helps. Hugs to you, your children and your friend's family.

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  9. incredibly sad, sending loving thoughts.
    sammie xx

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  10. A friend of my daughter's died the same way as month or so ago. So sorry for everyone. We never found out the cause. He'd just been discharged from hospital with a broken leg.

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  11. Grief is not selfish - it's necessary. I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.

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  12. Such a sad post for you to have to write x I am the same with my daughter but I will ring her in the morning now x

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  13. Thank you everyone. The funeral is in two days. It still doesn't seem real. It will become very real when I see her parents. Their lives will be forever changed.

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  14. Reminds me of a childhood friend. One week he was fine and the next he was dead. I couldn't remember the cause of death

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  15. I am so completely saddened for this tragic loss. ☹️

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  16. Oh how dreadful!
    Words fail in such a situation. Prayers go out for all affected by this tragic loss.
    Hugs,
    B

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  17. I'm so very sorry about the loss of your friend's daughter. So tragic for all who knew and loved her.

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  18. I am so sorry to read this...Prayers for everyone. What a tragedy.

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  19. The passing and funeral for a young person is ever so sad. I am so very sorry for their pain and this great loss. Prayers.

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  20. Oh- That is so very sad. You think once you get your kids past all the babyhood illnesses and the years of young driving adventures and their first introduction into alcohol that they will be safe--that you can let go a little and not have to cling so tightly as a safety net. It is just incredibly sad when something like this happens. We have had friends lose young adult children, too, and it is devastating. God bless them and God bless you and you go to share their grief. xo Diana

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  21. How unbelievably sad. Whenever I hear a story like this it really shakes me up. So sorry for your friends.

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  22. It's important to share your grief. It is very sad. Our kids have friends whose son died of a brain tumour at age 5. Terribly difficult, but you have to work your way through it. This is a good start.

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