Happy post-Valentines Day. Happy Family Day today. It is a holiday here. In honour of Family Day, the theme of Mundane Monday is birth order and family size.
I'll start. I am the youngest of four. I have two older brothers and one older sister. We are all spread quite far apart in age, with gaps of 4, or 5 years between us. I do not have the sibling rivalry memories that others may have. My oldest brother and I are thirteen years apart, so for much of my childhood, he wasn't even living in the same house because he was away at university or working. I was the flower girl in his wedding.
Do I feel I had advantages to being the youngest? I am honestly not sure, because I think my parents were much different parents by the time I was an adolescent, or older teen. I don't really even know what my two oldest siblings' childhoods were like, as I didn't yet exist, or I was too young to remember.
Where are you in the birth order of things? Do you have siblings? Do you come from a large family, or are you an only child?
I'm a middle child but we were spaced out with a lot of years in between, even more than you and your siblings. I think that does reduce some of the alleged characteristics of birth order.
ReplyDeleteI agree, Debra.
DeleteI maintain that no two children (with the possible exception of twins, etc.--that's another whole kettle of fish) are ever born into the 'same family' because not only has time/events changed the family members in between children, but the family dynamics change every time another person enters it. Speaking as the mother of four...
ReplyDeleteI'm the youngest of two (both females). Not a fun place to be with an sibling four years older. Especially one who believed she should be an only child. :)
Yes, good point, Mary.
DeleteHappy Family Day Jenn. I'm from a large family; I'm #11 of 12 for my Mom, #15 of 19 for my Dad. I think after 4 or 5 kids anyone else just gets lost in the shuffle. ... Mary-Lou =^[..]^=
ReplyDeleteHappy Family Day to you, too! Those are some big families!
DeleteI'm four years older than my only sibling, a brother. I was born when my father was overseas serving in World War II and was a little over three years old when he came home. My mom and I lived with my grandparents and four of their daughters still at home. When Dad arrived on the scene, we moved to our own small house and I felt uprooted from the only home I had 'til then known. It was a difficult adjustment for both my dad and me, I'm told. Complicated all the more when my brother was born a little more than a year later. In many ways, my brother was my dad's "first" child. Even though brother and I were four years apart in age, we were very close all through childhood. Although I do believe I always exhibited the traits of an "only child." Definitely those of a first born, for better or worse. ;o)
ReplyDeleteSee now, you've just taken this from a mundane topic to a very interesting one!
DeleteI am number 6 out of 9. 3 boys and 6 girls. The oldest 2 girls were grown and gone as soon as they could go or they'd end up babysitting all us younger kids. We had a really nice childhood. Love my brothers and sisters! Only 2 have past away. 1 as an infant and the first born daughter in 2016 at 72 years old. I'm 65 now and my youngest brother and the baby of the family will be 60 this year.
ReplyDeleteSounds like a great family experience, Kathy. I think nine is a big amount!
DeleteI am the youngest of five but always felt like the only one. My sister was twenty two years older than me (same parents) and was married before I was a year old. My brother was eleven years older than me and as he was already attending school in the town where my grandparents lived I nnly saw him the week ends. The other two - a boy and a girl - were born
ReplyDeletebefore me and died during infancy of pneumonia. So I always felt like an ony one. I had a very happy and secure childhood.
ReplyDeleteYou do have a unique situation and story to tell. Children dying in infancy is, thankfully, not a thing families generally have to face anymore.
DeleteI have two half sisters from my mum's second marriage who are four and five years younger than me so it always felt a bit like them and me rather than three. I also had a half brother from my dad's second marriage but didn't get to meet him until I was adult and went looking for him. He has since died. I loved him because we hadn't grown up together so only saw each other because we wanted to and I felt that meant we had the best of each other, the good times without any of the bad. I have two grown up boys that are two years apart in age and they were always the best of friends with the same circle of friends when growing up.
ReplyDeleteThere were just two of us with my brother 3 years older. Our personalities and way of thinking are quite different so we experienced our family differently yet with some similarities. He was almost always kind to me when we were just us but wanted to ditch me when others were around especially in teen years. We had entirely separate groups of friends. We have worked well together during our parents final years and after so I’d have to say there is a lot of respect and affection although we live on opposite sides of the country.
ReplyDeleteThere was just my younger brother and I. When we were kids, I was older so I would protect him. When we got older, he would protect me. I miss him. You have a wonderful day, hugs, Edna B.
ReplyDeleteFirst born (and female) - I so get that funny about being the test kid. The next, my brother seemed to be teflon coated by comparison.
ReplyDeleteI was the youngest of 3... each 4-5 years apart. My sister was 10 years older and married by the time I was 10, but my older brother and I were 4 years apart and close. They are both gone now and I do miss them. No one has ever been able to make me laugh as much as my brother did.
ReplyDeleteI was the caboose of a very large family, and my eldest sisters were grown and gone when I was born. Now they are all gone, either physically or mentally.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear that.
DeleteI love the meme's; too funny.
ReplyDeleteI have( had) an older brother Mark who was four years older than I, and we even thought we had different childhoods. He passed away at the age of 26, so I've been an only child for a long time...actually, I suppose I'm an orphan now since both parents have passed on? Anyhoo....he being the older brother, he pretty much tortured me as a kid. But me being a little brat, I probably deserved it. HA!
I am the youngest of 4 too. I am the only girl. Being farmers the life for the boys was slightly different to mine so that needs to be added into the equation. I don't think I was spoilt, I often had to play on my own although I am sure I was well loved I often felt quite lonely and the odd one out. We have fairly close gaps in our ages. I am close to two of them and always have been, and I am not close to the middle boy, and none of us are. My oldest brother has always looked after me and this has never changed throughout our lives and he still does now.
ReplyDeleteI am the youngest of two, my brother was just over a year older. Unfortunately he was very jealous of me and we never really got on, even into adulthood and old age. I was my father´s favourite and he was my mother´s, so it should have evened things out.
ReplyDeleteI come from a family of four; my older brother is my mother's son from a previous marriage and is 9 years older than I am, and I have two younger siblings. The three of us were born within 35 months so my mom was busy!
ReplyDeleteMy older brother and I stay connected but are not close as we're diametrically opposed politically and socially. My sister and I haven't spoken since my Dad's funeral in 2008...her choice not mine. But my youngest brother and I are close and we talk on the phone almost every day.
My mother was a late life baby, born 13 years after her next sibling. It really messed her up because her teenage siblings resented her arrival, and, her parents were quite old. My grandparents were very elderly by the time I arrived on the scene. My parents were older by the time I was born, right at the end of WW11. We cousins often say we came in two waves, before and after the war. We have first cousins in their fifties and first cousins in their eighties!
ReplyDeleteMy brother and I are just 18 months apart - I'm the older. We were good friends as youngsters but soon after elementary school had our own set of friends who became more important than siblings. We still keep in touch but live in different countries now and are unlikely to meet face to face again.
ReplyDeleteI'm 4th in a family of 13, and the oldest girl. So I was middle, sort of, and yet oldest too, in a way. Because in the 50's in our family the oldest girl had a lot of responsibility on her shoulders, including cooking, cleaning, babysitting--well, baby-raising actually--and on and on. I didn't have the typical teenage experiences because I was raising my siblings, along with my next-down sister. Mom was ill or working most of those years. I married and had my first child at 17, jumping from the kettle to the fire. But I have no resentment about the way I was raised. We were happy, a big, close family and we knew we were loved. It was just a lot different from most of the kids I knew in the 60's.
ReplyDeleteI'm an only. An only who always wanted siblngs!
ReplyDeleteI am the oldest of four. The first three, my two brothers and I all put in an appearance within five years. My sister, the fourth, is ten and a half years younger than I. I didn't know her until she was an adult. Most importantly, the same father was a totally different father to her.
ReplyDeleteI am the oldest of four. I have one sister and two brothers. My youngest brother is 10 years younger than me.
ReplyDeleteGod bless.
I am an only who grew up surrounded by adults. As such I was never “chidish” nor was I spoiled. My parents saw to that latter point! But being an only did provide me with the opportunity to make lifelong friends. Coming up on 50 years of friendship with some of them. Geez I am old LOL
ReplyDeleteI have an older sister and a twin brother. To be honest, my sister has never gotten over having not one but two babies thrust on her at the tender age of three. My sister and I have been estranged since our mom died 17 years ago due to my sister's creative accounting settling my mom's estate. I have the care of my brother who is in a nursing home. Growing up, my mom would often refer to us as Ann and the twins or Eric and the girls so I kind of got lost in the shuffle. My sister always felt more entitled because she gave my parents three grandchildren. I know we were loved and that's all that counts. Our priest once said "The best gift you can give your parents is to love their other children". Good advice.
ReplyDeleteI'm an only child period. Not much more to say. And no I wasn't spoiled.
ReplyDeleteMy Mom and Dad had 3 children. A girl, a boy who died when he was 3 and then me. However, my Dad was killed by lightning when Mom was 4 months pregnant with me so that makes me the baby. My one sister is still living... turned 96 on Feb. 15. and me at age 87.
ReplyDeleteI am the oldest and 8 years older than my little brother and sister. I always had to haul them around and watch them when they were little. Unlike me. My memories were sitting alone with my toys in the back of the pickup while my parents farmed. My brother and I still laugh about how I taught them to bike and drive. All boyfriends or girlfriends went through me before my parents. I guess I never had kids, because it felt like I had already raised kids. Good question. Do you keep in touch with your sisters and brother?
ReplyDeleteI am, once again, amazed at the comments on this topic. It seems that there is a wide range of experiences out there, and it is interesting how many people commented that they are not really in touch with their sibling(s). I do still keep in touch with my siblings, more my sister than my brothers.(She is closest to me in age - five years). I live within three hours driving distance from them, but with Covid, I have not been physically together with them for about a year.
ReplyDeleteI'm the middle child and was very close to my sister when we were growing up. I have an older brother who has never been one for keeping in touch and I haven't heard from him in 5 years, My younger sister and I don't speak anymore after she cut all communication a few years after my mum dies. It's a long story and she has a few childhood problem to sort through. She always sees herself as the victim and until she sorts through those problems she will never change.
ReplyDeleteI always thought it was strange not speaking to a sibling but too be honest I don't miss either of them. I have a loving family and great friends who are like sisters to me. What more could I need?
Jenn that first funny got me laughing! :) I'm the second of five and I will spare you the childhood traumas I went through. I will however confirm that my youngest sister (#5) got away with much more than any of us older kids ever did!
ReplyDeleteI am oldest of four: Time Keeper, Whistle Blower, Referee.
ReplyDeleteHowever they all grew taller than I, so that's their revenge.